Once upon a time . . . (HA! I’ve always wanted to start a story like that and I just did) when my son was just a wee lad I let him go outside to play with some of his friends. He couldn’t have been more than about 6 or 7 so I kept an eye on him and his friends from the window. I could see them but more importantly I could hear them. There were some other parents who I trusted that were outside too so I felt comfortable with him being out there.
Suddenly I realized I couldn’t hear them anymore. I went outside to investigate. When I opened the door about 6 young boys were all in a circle looking at the same point on the ground. As I got closer I saw what they were looking at – an ant trail. A trail of ants going about doing whatever it is that ants do. But one young kid was stepping on the ants. This disturbed me. So I got their attention-
Me: “Hey, what are you guys doing?”
Kid: “Killing ants”
Me: “Why?”
Kid: - no reply (actually all 6 or so kids including my son had this blank stare on their faces)
Me: “Let me help you guys out. You are probably stepping on and killing those ants because they are smaller than you and frankly because you can. Well, all of YOU are smaller than me and I could easily step on you like you are stepping on these ants – because I can or because I think its fun. Would you like me to do that to you?
Kid: (clearly looking worried) “No”
Me: “Those ants were doing nothing to you and not bothering you at all. None of you have the right to step on them and kill them. And just like you don’t want me to come and disturb you and step on you, they don’t want you disturbing them or stepping on them. Just because you CAN take a particular action doesn’t mean you SHOULD take a particular action. You are being bullies to the ants because you are stronger and bigger. But I can bully each and every one of you because I’m bigger and stronger than you all – combined. Should I bully you? Would you like that?
Leave the ants alone. We clear guys?”
All the Kids: “Yes Sir”
Me: “Cool. Enjoy the day, gentlemen”
And I went back inside and looked out of the window at them. Yep, they were shook up. Good.
This was many years ago. Sometimes I wonder if I was too harsh on them, because as they dispersed they were clearly affected by what I said. But I look at my son now. He’s older and he has a compassion for life and people and a balance I didn’t have at his age. I hope for the other kids I spoke to that day something clicked for them and somewhere down the line they can pass the lesson on that I passed to them.
GEE
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